The 4 + 1 Kanyas in my Room

“Jhalak Dikhlaajaa….. Jhalak Dikhlaajaa….." , went the song in the radio when I was happily climbing the stairs returning from the office to the hostel. Surprise!!!!! I saw loads of luggage at the door of my room. Some new inmates I guessed…. Ya… I was right… 3 gals had come. ‘chalo…’, I thought…. ‘ new company in the room’. Till then me, Maha & a school teacher whom we call Aunty had been living. Now here were the new additions. Before the kanyas, I spoke to their moms. They were busy supervising the place their daughters were supposed to live. I assured them saying everything was gud, the stay, the fud, the facilities… bla…bla… bla…. They left the place after getting convinced. Another gal made entry in our room the next day.

I didn’t have any grudge on any of the gals, within 3 days, they started showing their real colors. Infact this aunty had made our living miserable, to add to this…. here they were the 4 hopeless kanyas…. with complete support from this aunty. They leave the hostel by 7 in the morning. Me and Maha around 9. These kanyas get up at 5 or 5.30 & purposely disturb our sleep. They open and close the bathroom doors, the cupboard with a thud. Even the buckets are kept making sound. I requested one of them not to make the noise.. but one of the gal whom I call 4 foot asked, ‘should I do it in a slow motion’.

Maaaannn….. I hate that 4 foot. I feel like reaching my hands to her neck. The other 3 gals are OK in their place. They infact are her chamchis. If she is not in the place, the other gals are bheegi billis. Really… this 4 foot has a lot & lot of ego in her. Only I don’t say this, the whole of the hostel gals support my sentence. To add to this they put some special effects which increases my temper. They are not at all hygienic, manner less, no good communication. They eat in a plate whose shape is like the ones given in jails. I was wondering the company which hired them didn’t find any other candidates or what. Now I don’t have any value for that company also. They even break many rules of the hostel.

From the day they have come I and Maha have lost our sleep. They have crossed their limits.
If they had any topic to speak about us, it would be in Tamil. They assumed we don’t understand, I don’t but Maha does. My translator would translate each sentence and tell me abt their conversation. Once it so happened that one of the kanyas saw Maha speaking to the maid in Tamil. She stood there with her mouth wide opened. The news spread to the other gang members by evening and since then they have stopped talking abt us. Bahanda photo gaya na ke Maha understud Tamil….

Preeti is a budding shayari (hope word is correct) these days…. The sole inspiration & motivation being the chaar foot. She uses so many cosmetics to become fair (she is basically very dark). Other gals in the hostel call her SNOW WHITE. The way she scrubs her face reminds me of how ppl scrub the wash basin…. The way she luks, the way she walks….. my god!!!!
Ok, here goes the shayri….

Toh arz kiya hai…………. “Koi ladka agar mere place mein hota….. aur uske nakhre jhatke dekhta……”
(say wah wah plz……. Thank u)
“Koi ladka agar mere place mein hota….. aur uske nakhre jhatke dekhta……,
Behosh ho kar bechara, phir kabhi nahi uthta..”

Howzaaaaaattttt?????
I enjoyed sharing with Maha. What laugh we had!! Infact I said this in front to f the char foot. I donno if she understood…..

There is open partiality n politics going on in the hostel. Even the sister is not gud with us these days, she is supporting the gals who are not to be supported.
The so called aunty is a school teacher for name sake. I donno wat she is teaching the children there. Once she was telling me, “ molle…. you go & live in a PG or a hostel where your people live (she meant the ppl of my caste…. hopeless she is….) you will find your fud there too…”. Never expected such a sentence from a teacher who should be teaching about unity……..

What do u have to say????

Never take risk while drinking

Forwarded Messssssssage....

When I come from office in the evening, wife is cooking.

I can hear the noise of utensils in the kitchen. I stealthily enter the house. Take out the bottle from my black cupboard. Shivaji Maharaj is looking at me from the photoframe. But still no one is aware of it. Because I never take a risk. I take out the glass from the rack above the old sink. Quickly enjoy one peg. Wash the glass and again keep it on the rack. Of course I also keep the bottle inside my cupboard. Shivaji Maharaj is giving a smile. I peep into the kitchen. Wife is cutting potatoes. No one is aware of what I did. Because I never take a risk.

I: Any news on Iyer's daughter's marriage??
She: Nope, she doesn't seem to be that lucky. Still they are looking out for her.

I again come out; there is a small noise of the black cupboard. But I don't make any sound while taking out the bottle. I take out the glass from the old rack above sink. Quickly enjoy one peg. Wash the bottle and keep it in the sink. Also keep the Black Glass in the cupboard. But still no one is aware of what I did. Because I never take a risk.

I: But still I think Iyer's daughter's age is not that much....
She: What are you saying? She is 28 yrs old...like an aged horse
I: (I forgot her age is 28) Oh Oh...

I again take out potatoes out from my blackcupboard. But the cupboard's place has automatically changed. I take out the bottle from the rack and quickly enjoy one peg in the sink. Shivaji Maharaj laughs loudly. I keep the rack in the potatoes & wash Shivaji Maharaj's photo & keep it in the black cupboard. Wife is keeping the sink on the stove. But still no one is aware of what I did. Because I never take a risk.

I: (getting angry) you call Mr. Iyer a horse? Ifyou say that again, I will cut your tongue...!
She: Don't just blabber something, go out and sit quietly...

I take out the bottle from the potatoes. Go in the black cupboard and enjoy a peg. Wash the sink and keep it over the rack. Wife is giving a smile. Shivaji Maharaj is still cooking. But still no one is aware of what I did. Because I never take a risk.

I: (laughing) So Iyer is marrying a horse!!
She: Hey go and sprinkle some water on yourface...

I again go to the kitchen, and quietly sit on the rack. Stove is also on the rack. There is a small noise of bottles from the room outside. I peep and see that wife is enjoying a peg in the sink. But none of the horses are aware of what I did. Because Shivaji Maharaj never takes a risk. Iyer is still cooking. And I am looking at my wife from the photo and laughing. Because I never take a risk